This Is Not Legal Advice

But it might teach you how to use the law to your advantage…

Who is Justin?

Justin is a writer and former lawyer and is not much good at being either. He is also a red-head, a lover of pugs, his parents’ second favourite child (of two), and a very lucky husband to a beautiful and amazing wife. He is clumsy, awkward, accident-prone but generally well-meaning. He likes to write in the third person and I regularly like to change the grammatical point of view in your writing. 

Justin has worked at some of Australia’s biggest law firms. He only failed to pass probation at one of them. None of them have ever invited him to join their alumni clubs.

He also set up his own practice in 2015, and won the Sole Practitioner of the Year award in 2016 at the Australian Law Awards. It was his first award since he received a merit certificate from Mrs Larkham in Year Three for his ‘very interesting project on jets’. He now knows how to file a Business Activity Statement, which he believes makes him slightly more useful as a husband and as a person. He is good at lying to himself. 

Want to know more about Justin? Really? Alright, you asked for it…

I grew up wanting to be a police officer... - mainly because they seemed to help people out. I always remember having a very clear sense of what was right and what was wrong from a very early age. I was very much a rule follower, and would proudly dob on my brother whenever he did something that was naughty. I stopped when he got bigger, stronger and more handsome than me, which came much earlier in our lives than I hoped and expected.

I grew up wanting to be a police officer…

mainly because they seemed to help people out. I always remember having a very clear sense of what was right and what was wrong from a very early age. I was very much a rule follower, and would proudly dob on my brother whenever he did something that was naughty. I stopped when he got bigger, stronger and more handsome than me, which came much earlier in our lives than I hoped and expected.

Then I wanted to be a doctor... - because they also got to help people out, and got paid more than police officers. Doctors also have the rare privilege of forming close and long-lasting relationships with their clients - I mean patients - and helping them through some of the most painful, difficult, and exciting moments of their lives. Turns out, though, that getting into medical school is seriously hard (for me), and after failing the entrance exams 3 times in a row I had to find another career. Ideally, one that would not get me shot but would still allow me to form strong relationships with those in need of help or guidance.I could have been a social worker. I could have been a nurse, physiotherapist, or aged care provider. All noble professions.Instead, I became a lawyer. Sorry. I know it is not the most respectable or interesting of careers. It wasn't all bad, though. I still got to meet some interesting people, and form some amazing friendships. Most importantly, I met my beautiful wife while working at my first law firm, which will always be the best thing that has ever come of me deciding to be a lawyer.

Then I wanted to be a doctor…

because they also got to help people out, and got paid more than police officers. Doctors also have the rare privilege of forming close and long-lasting relationships with their clients – I mean patients – and helping them through some of the most painful, difficult, and exciting moments of their lives. Turns out, though, that getting into medical school is seriously hard (for me), and after failing the entrance exams 3 times in a row I had to find another career. Ideally, one that would not get me shot but would still allow me to form strong relationships with those in need of help or guidance.

I could have been a social worker. I could have been a nurse, physiotherapist, or aged care provider. All noble professions.

Instead, I became a lawyer. Sorry. I know it is not the most respectable or interesting of careers. It wasn’t all bad, though. I still got to meet some interesting people, and form some amazing friendships. Most importantly, I met my beautiful wife while working at my first law firm, which will always be the best thing that has ever come of me deciding to be a lawyer.

Then I wanted to play in an emo band... - and I have no excuses for this. I wrote one song in my entire musical career, called 'Oxide'. It was all power chords and late teen angst, which means it was absolutely horrible. Really, I just wanted to use this space to share a photograph of my brother and I in our early 20's, as proof of how handsome my bro was (and is) compared to me.Cargo pants were a big part of my late teen life.

Then I wanted to play in an emo band…

and I have no excuses for this. I wrote one song in my entire musical career, called ‘Oxide’. It was all power chords and late teen angst, which means it was absolutely horrible. Really, I just wanted to use this space to share a photograph of my brother and I in our early 20’s, as proof of how handsome my bro was (and is) compared to me.

Cargo pants were a big part of my late teen life.

Now, I write about silly legal topics for your hopeful amusement and education... - but I never intended to write an entire book. It just kind of happened.I like to write, to research, and to learn. I embraced my hermit-like hobby and started writing about legal topics that interested me. And to my delight, and continual surprise, people seemed to like what I wrote, or were kind enough to pretend they liked it.The end result was a book. That I wrote. And edited (oh man, so much editing). Writing it was one of the most frustrating, stressful, and enjoyable experiences of my life.Hopefully for those brave enough to read it, the book is simply enjoyable.

Now, I write about silly legal topics for your hopeful amusement and education…

but I never intended to write an entire book. It just kind of happened.

I like to write, to research, and to learn. I embraced my hermit-like hobby and started writing about legal topics that interested me. And to my delight, and continual surprise, people seemed to like what I wrote, or were kind enough to pretend they liked it.

The end result was a book. That I wrote. And edited (oh man, so much editing). Writing it was one of the most frustrating, stressful, and enjoyable experiences of my life.

Hopefully for those brave enough to read it, the book is simply enjoyable.